Booty Calls: A Debate

[zamboni]

Here's the deal.

Last week, I was outside around 10:30pm, and my cute neighbor comes out. I ask him where he's going, and he says "Booty Call." I gave the Boni seal of approval, and he left.

The next morning, I get in my car and leave the complex at 7:45 to get to work... As I'm driving out of our parking lot, he passes me, driving in. He waves, I wave... Busted.

Which caused my roommate and I to discuss the situation.

To us, a booty call is basically when you get in, get 'er done, and get out.
Rolling home at 7:45 am falls more under the category of Friends with Benefits, or even possibly dating.

Plain and simple, if you spend the night, it's not a booty call.

We have one friend who does not follow this train of thought... and we've been arguing all week about it.

Any thoughts?

[Daiquiri Dematas]

I agree, no spending the night.

[beaner76]

As I have repeatedly stated, this could still be a booty call. you never know they may have been up all night repeating their actions. Some are just that lucky and just that exhausted the morning after. There is no need to label something that isn't there, leave it be.

[Daiquiri Dematas]

As I have repeatedly stated, this could still be a booty call. you never know they may have been up all night repeating their actions. Some are just that lucky and just that exhausted the morning after. There is no need to label something that isn't there, leave it be.

An all nighter is acceptable, but if there is any sleep involved then that is more than a booty call in my opinion.

[zamboni]

If you are up all night repeating your actions... then you need to scoop that man up.

just sayin.

The best part is my epic drunk dial on Sunday. I drunk received a hilarious drunk dial, and was overcome by the urge to pass on the love. So I called the cute neighbor, and proceeded to school him on the difference between Booty Call and FWB. On his voicemail.


Each week I find another way to humiliate myself so much that I have to spend a full week avoiding him. Then when it blows over, I do it all over again.

I'm an entertaining gal, at least.

[Zak]

I agree with Dematas, with the bed is shares outside of TI^2ing, it is more than a booty call

[Daiquiri Dematas]

If you are up all night repeating your actions... then you need to scoop that man up.

just sayin.

The best part is my epic drunk dial on Sunday. I drunk received a hilarious drunk dial, and was overcome by the urge to pass on the love. So I called the cute neighbor, and proceeded to school him on the difference between Booty Call and FWB. On his voicemail.


Each week I find another way to humiliate myself so much that I have to spend a full week avoiding him. Then when it blows over, I do it all over again.

I'm an entertaining gal, at least.

I can't wait to meet you.

[zamboni]

Everyone is invited to our EoSP...



Nov. 15th.

We can even consider it an early bday party for me!!

[Zak]

Everyone is invited to our EoSP...



Nov. 15th.

We can even consider it an early bday party for me!!

cause obviously it's all about you

[zamboni]

Everyone is invited to our EoSP...



Nov. 15th.

We can even consider it an early bday party for me!!

cause obviously it's all about you

it's it always?

[iguana19]

a booty call is a get er done and leave kind of thing, however, there are exceptions. as beaner mentioned, if it is an all night romp that is intense enough to make you pass out for a hot minute here and there causing an early morning arrival back at home, well it happens. another exception would be the weekend/far away booty call. sometimes that great booty call is far away and is definitely worth the trip but you know you aren't coming back that night. maybe it's so good you need to make it 2 nights but the distance demands you stay rather than drive back and forth. however, once that drive becomes routine and the distance not an issue, well then the booty call phase is over and you might as well just fess up and call her/him your significant other.

[zamboni]

well said.

Maybe y'all can shed some light on another situation...

Hypothetically, of course.

Let's say a boy in California is flying to CT to see someone... and if his work doesn't allow him to get to CT, he wants to fly her out to CA.

They met 5 years ago, had a couple nights of necking and heavy petting... and a month later he flew to see her for her birthday... more necking and heavy petting, but it never progressed passed that.

They haven't seen each other since then... although plans have been attempted by both. It had been well over a year since they have even talked on the phone, until Sept... and now they end up talking for hours about once a week.

What's that?

[Daiquiri Dematas]

well said.

Maybe y'all can shed some light on another situation...

Hypothetically, of course.

Let's say a boy in California is flying to CT to see someone... and if his work doesn't allow him to get to CT, he wants to fly her out to CA.

They met 5 years ago, had a couple nights of necking and heavy petting... and a month later he flew to see her for her birthday... more necking and heavy petting, but it never progressed passed that.

They haven't seen each other since then... although plans have been attempted by both. It had been well over a year since they have even talked on the phone, until Sept... and now they end up talking for hours about once a week.

What's that?

That's called a long distance soon to be booty call if all goes well.

[*Angel*]

Oh my goodness.

It never occurred to me that spending the night negated the inherent spontaneity of the booty call. In my brain I was defining a booty call as any TIsquaring that occurred based on an impromptu phone call/text message to someone who you are not physically with at the time of said phone call/text message - with the intent of meeting up for meaningless TIsquaring.

The "sleepover factor" never crossed my mind.

This totally alters my concept of FWBs and 1NSs.

[zamboni]

Even though there are no expectations of booty? It's been made clear that not only is it not expected, but almost definitely not going to happen.

Something about wanting it to be special.

Which is why it hasn't happened yet... he said the same thing last time too.

[*Angel*]

Carey - this sounds like a "we would be in a relationship if we lived within 30 minutes of each other but we don't so we have to settle for this" relationship.

It's too bad. Sounds like a good boy.

[zamboni]

Oh my goodness.

It never occurred to me that spending the night negated the inherent spontaneity of the booty call. In my brain I was defining a booty call as any TIsquaring that occurred based on an impromptu phone call/text message to someone who you are not physically with at the time of said phone call/text message - with the intent of meeting up for meaningless TIsquaring.

The "sleepover factor" never crossed my mind.

This totally alters my concept of FWBs and 1NSs.

Sorry to pull the rug out from under your feet

Does the phone call/text have to be impromptu? If it is premeditated, does that change things? What if you know for a fact that after the bar you are going to call a certain person and have them come over.. still meaningless, still a romp and bolt situation... but not exactly impromptu...

[iguana19]

well said.

Maybe y'all can shed some light on another situation...

Hypothetically, of course.

Let's say a boy in California is flying to CT to see someone... and if his work doesn't allow him to get to CT, he wants to fly her out to CA.

They met 5 years ago, had a couple nights of necking and heavy petting... and a month later he flew to see her for her birthday... more necking and heavy petting, but it never progressed passed that.

They haven't seen each other since then... although plans have been attempted by both. It had been well over a year since they have even talked on the phone, until Sept... and now they end up talking for hours about once a week.

What's that?

first of all i must say these questions should be sent to nutz and twigs lol

so in response to your "hypothetical situation" sometimes there is nothing better than a year-long wait for a booty call, even if you haven't talked in that long. people come and go in your life and there are right and wrong times for everything. just cause you haven't talked in a year doesn't mean it was for any particular reason. distance is tough, especially across the country. things happen for a reason and timing is everything. just imagine all the tension that can build up in that amt of time...it creates this inner beast where the petting and necking can turn into clawing and biting and quite the wild time. the talking once a week for hours is creating that tension again and setting things up for another possible encounter. not something that i would dwell on, but if it happens it happens and you just grab the bull by the horns and ride it till you can't take any more.

[*Angel*]

...it creates this inner beast where the petting and necking can turn into clawing and biting and quite the wild time. the talking once a week for hours is creating that tension again and setting things up for another possible encounter. not something that i would dwell on, but if it happens it happens and you just grab the bull by the horns and ride it till you can't take any more.

Oh my.

[zamboni]

first of all i must say these questions should be sent to nutz and twigs lol

so in response to your "hypothetical situation" sometimes there is nothing better than a year-long wait for a booty call, even if you haven't talked in that long. people come and go in your life and there are right and wrong times for everything. just cause you haven't talked in a year doesn't mean it was for any particular reason. distance is tough, especially across the country. things happen for a reason and timing is everything. just imagine all the tension that can build up in that amt of time...it creates this inner beast where the petting and necking can turn into clawing and biting and quite the wild time. the talking once a week for hours is creating that tension again and setting things up for another possible encounter. not something that i would dwell on, but if it happens it happens and you just grab the bull by the horns and ride it till you can't take any more.

Hypothetically, of course.

[iguana19]

first of all i must say these questions should be sent to nutz and twigs lol

so in response to your "hypothetical situation" sometimes there is nothing better than a year-long wait for a booty call, even if you haven't talked in that long. people come and go in your life and there are right and wrong times for everything. just cause you haven't talked in a year doesn't mean it was for any particular reason. distance is tough, especially across the country. things happen for a reason and timing is everything. just imagine all the tension that can build up in that amt of time...it creates this inner beast where the petting and necking can turn into clawing and biting and quite the wild time. the talking once a week for hours is creating that tension again and setting things up for another possible encounter. not something that i would dwell on, but if it happens it happens and you just grab the bull by the horns and ride it till you can't take any more.

Hypothetically, of course.

oh but of course

[*Angel*]

Oh my goodness.

It never occurred to me that spending the night negated the inherent spontaneity of the booty call. In my brain I was defining a booty call as any TIsquaring that occurred based on an impromptu phone call/text message to someone who you are not physically with at the time of said phone call/text message - with the intent of meeting up for meaningless TIsquaring.

The "sleepover factor" never crossed my mind.

This totally alters my concept of FWBs and 1NSs.

Sorry to pull the rug out from under your feet

Does the phone call/text have to be impromptu? If it is premeditated, does that change things? What if you know for a fact that after the bar you are going to call a certain person and have them come over.. still meaningless, still a romp and bolt situation... but not exactly impromptu...

But would it not still seem impromptu to the receiver? You may both know that it's always a possiblity but until you get the "what are you doing?" text, you don't know when the next HU will be.

[Cheifnutz]

Even though there are no expectations of booty? It's been made clear that not only is it not expected, but almost definitely not going to happen.

Something about wanting it to be special.

Which is why it hasn't happened yet... he said the same thing last time too.

Hmm. Sounds like the guy is gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but at this age everyone knows it aint that special, u know what I mean? Its the same thing everubody does and has done for over 100 million years......Even if the first time is "special" that wears off pretty quicky and you get down to the TIsqring every one is really looking for.

[zamboni]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?


(meanwhile, first communication of the week with cute neighbor... he texted me to ask if i would be willing to take him and his friend "for a spin in my awesome wheels" this evening. ) wtf. do i look like a flippin' taxi?

[*Angel*]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that.

[Zak]

...Does the phone call/text have to be impromptu? If it is premeditated, does that change things? What if you know for a fact that after the bar you are going to call a certain person and have them come over.. still meaningless, still a romp and bolt situation... but not exactly impromptu...

The subject of booty calls came up in a recent episode of how I met your mother. I'll see if I can find the clip for you to help clarrify

[iguana19]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that.

i disagree, a booty call can happen during the day, why not? it is not set to a time or place or state of mind. if you're bored at home or at work, what's wrong with a little hanky panky to break up the day? doesn't have to be planned, maybe a time and place but that's any booty call anyway.

[Cheifnutz]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that.

i disagree, a booty call can happen during the day, why not? it is not set to a time or place or state of mind. if you're bored at home or at work, what's wrong with a little hanky panky to break up the day? doesn't have to be planned, maybe a time and place but that's any booty call anyway.

I disagree, Booty calls only are phone calls made after 9pm. Because any earlier would infer that more was expected that just a sexy time explosion. Therefore making it a FWB situation.

[Zak]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that.

i disagree, a booty call can happen during the day, why not? it is not set to a time or place or state of mind. if you're bored at home or at work, what's wrong with a little hanky panky to break up the day? doesn't have to be planned, maybe a time and place but that's any booty call anyway.

I disagree, Booty calls only are phone calls made after 9pm. Because any earlier would infer that more was expected that just a sexy time explosion. Therefore making it a FWB situation.

does that mean that knocking on the hot neighbors door after returning from the bar is not a booty call?

[*Angel*]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that.

i disagree, a booty call can happen during the day, why not? it is not set to a time or place or state of mind. if you're bored at home or at work, what's wrong with a little hanky panky to break up the day? doesn't have to be planned, maybe a time and place but that's any booty call anyway.

I disagree, Booty calls only are phone calls made after 9pm. Because any earlier would infer that more was expected that just a sexy time explosion. Therefore making it a FWB situation.

10-4. To me a booty call would be like thinking "I want to TIsquare. Now or as close to now as possible. Who can assist me with this?" versus the daytime HU-setup which is like thinking "I want to TIsquare this specific person tonight."
It makes it MOre about the person than about the TIsquaring. And I think a booty call would be MOstly about TIsquaring.

Ooo-weee, this is complicated.

[beaner76]

What if the "What's up?" text is sent earlier in the day.

And a time/place is arranged? Does that change anything?

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that.

Thank you! A f*ck buddy that is the term I have been searching for and Carey has been unsuccessful coming up with! There is no need to put awful relationship labels on what you are doing, especially when A.) you aren't friends with the person you are f*cking and B.) there is no way in hell you would ever be in a relationship with them because they already have a "girlfriend" and/or are too young. Why not just enjoy the long hours of unbridled, animalistic, hardcore sex they bring you all thanks to WAKA! or whatever, however you met them.

[Cheifnutz]

I would not consider this a booty call at all. This would be plain old TIsquaring. A F*ck Buddy.

I can't believe I just said that. [/quote]

i disagree, a booty call can happen during the day, why not? it is not set to a time or place or state of mind. if you're bored at home or at work, what's wrong with a little hanky panky to break up the day? doesn't have to be planned, maybe a time and place but that's any booty call anyway.[/quote]

I disagree, Booty calls only are phone calls made after 9pm. Because any earlier would infer that more was expected that just a sexy time explosion. Therefore making it a FWB situation.[/quote]

does that mean that knocking on the hot neighbors door after returning from the bar is not a booty call?[/quote]

No booty call in this situation. It would be under the term, solicitation for sexy time explosion, the exception would be if you called him after 9pm. But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

[beaner76]

This brings to question the mass booty text. Send out the text "interested tonight" see what replies you get and pick out your favorite, or go with the first depending on bad you want it at the moment. While this is premeditated somewhat, you need to determine who you will be sending it to and then how will turn down the ones you decide against. You still end up satisfied by the end of the night. Just make sure aren't so drunk you that you reply "come on over" to two different guys, while that could be quite fun, 9 out of 10 times it won't be pretty.

[*Angel*]

But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

Ew yeah. Neighbors seems dangerous. Too many opportunities to potentially get your feelings hurt by running into them with someone else should you develop feelings.

[Cheifnutz]

But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

Ew yeah. Neighbors seems dangerous. Too many opportunities to potentially get your feelings hurt by running into them with someone else should you develop feelings.

Yes Booty call by definition, you must have to get in your car and drive to an agreed upon location....the location in some instances could be the car itself....

[*Angel*]

Thank you! A f*ck buddy that is the term I have been searching for and Carey has been unsuccessful coming up with! There is no need to put awful relationship labels on what you are doing, especially when A.) you aren't friends with the person you are f*cking and B.) there is no way in hell you would ever be in a relationship with them because they already have a "girlfriend" and/or are too young. Why not just enjoy the long hours of unbridled, animalistic, hardcore sex they bring you all thanks to WAKA! or whatever, however you met them.

Okay - what if you ARE friends. You don't date each other at all - in fact, not even like platonic dates where it's just the two of you alone doing anything - except for the occassional TIsquaring.

This is all making me think of the "This, That, and The Other" episode of Seinfeld.

[Zak]

But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

Ew yeah. Neighbors seems dangerous. Too many opportunities to potentially get your feelings hurt by running into them with someone else should you develop feelings.

Yes Booty call by definition, you must have to get in your car and drive to an agreed upon location....the location in some instances could be the car itself....

Hmm, I may have to go retake the purity test then in that case. What about contact through aim/gchat/other instant messaging type program using the computer?

[Cheifnutz]

But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

Ew yeah. Neighbors seems dangerous. Too many opportunities to potentially get your feelings hurt by running into them with someone else should you develop feelings.

Yes Booty call by definition, you must have to get in your car and drive to an agreed upon location....the location in some instances could be the car itself....

Hmm, I may have to go retake the purity test then in that case. What about contact through aim/gchat/other instant messaging type program using the computer?

These are acceptable forms of "Booty Call" only if communications are breif and occur after 9pm EST.

[BigEasy]

But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

Ew yeah. Neighbors seems dangerous. Too many opportunities to potentially get your feelings hurt by running into them with someone else should you develop feelings.

Yes Booty call by definition, you must have to get in your car and drive to an agreed upon location....the location in some instances could be the car itself....

this certainly could not be the definition as it would exclude just about everyone I know in New York from ever having a booty call. change "get in your can and drive" to 'use a form of transportation' and we may be onto something

[Cheifnutz]

But beware, if this happens more than once and you are neighbors your are venturing into stalker/obsessive/fatal attraction territory and if said gentleman had his head on straight would turn down the solicitation.

Ew yeah. Neighbors seems dangerous. Too many opportunities to potentially get your feelings hurt by running into them with someone else should you develop feelings.

Yes Booty call by definition, you must have to get in your car and drive to an agreed upon location....the location in some instances could be the car itself....

this certainly could not be the definition as it would exclude just about everyone I know in New York from ever having a booty call. change "get in your can and drive" to 'use a form of transportation' and we may be onto something

Touche'..... Use a form of transportation or walking over one mile. Walking across the hall or to your nieghbors house does not count as transportation.