Week 2 Predictions

[bearFight]

Fall Kickball is finally upon us, ladies and gentlemen. While I wish the best of luck to all, I get to be the asshole that tells everyone how badly they're going to lose each week. So you'll probably come to hate me as much as Luke pretty soon. Let's get right to it.

6:15 Games
Brocery Bags (1-0) vs. Scared Kickless (1-0)
This is a battle of the teams that beat the shit out of 30STB last week... should be a really good game. Their defenses are about even, but I'll have to give the experience of SK an edge here. These are two fun teams to watch and ref.
BB 5, SK 7

Buck Nasty's Player Haters (1-0) vs. Rusty Trombones (0-1)
Don't know what to say about this one. With a full team, Buck Nasty won't be stopped, not this week. Rusty Trombones really let me down against dbag WSS last week, and I expect this week will be worse. It doesn't help my prediction that WSS only had 10 players last week. Sucks, guys. Start improving, I know you can do it.
BNPH 15, Rusty Trombones 3

The Dude Abides (0-1) vs. 30 Seconds to Bars (0-2)
30STB had a pretty rough start, but at least they fielded a team. The Dude Abides should finally have a team this week, so we'll have our first chance to see if they could ever one day be a contender. That being said, 30STB has made some changes to the lineup, and might be bringing back the style of Steele Peters for the rest of the season, so there aren't 8 homeruns over our right fielders in one inning. I'm giving us the edge in this one, just like I will every game this season. Sucks.
The Dude 5, 30STB 9


7:00 Games
Justin Thyme (0-1) vs. Nine Inch Males (0-0-1)
NIM couldn't score a single run last week, which made it pretty easy for me to put the stats together, but they also held the assets to 0 as well. Looks like their defense is down, and if they learn how to kick, Justin Thyme could be in for a beating.
Justin Thyme 3, NIM 8

Brocery Bags (1-0) vs. Why So Serious? (1-0)
Since I've never met any of WSS and that offends me, I will have to pick my BBs to obliterate them instead of just beating them by a narrow margin. Last week's score and Whit's opinion are all that I can judge on. WSS fielded a 10-person team last week, but have the largest roster in the league. We'll see what they can put up against the Baggers. Don't let me down, Duce.
BB 10, WSS 6

Three Kicks Mafia (0-1) vs. Colonel Angus and the Moist Discharge (1-0)
Now that 3KM has been introduced to the league, they play a team that won't yell at the refs. Boxey's discharge came out pretty well a few weeks ago, but she certainly has some holes to fill. The guys of 3KM would be happy to help her with that, I'm sure. Sorry, Sean.
3KM 7, Colonel Angus 9


7:45 Games
Hot Assets (0-0-1) vs. KIOS (1-0)
NIM/Hot Assets and KIOS/Justin Thyme have traded opponents. Makes for two interesting and very telling matchups this week. I am still giving the edge to both teams coming out of the NIM/Hot Assets matchup. Sorry KIOS. Prove me wrong.
Hot Assets 5, KIOS 3

Why So Serious? (1-0) vs. Three Kicks Mafia (0-1)
As much as I like the kids, they're not good, and I'm predicting destruction. I really hope I'm wrong and 3KM figured something out in the past week, or during their game with Colonel Angus. Probably not though.
WSS 10, 3KM 4

[patty no pants]

Digging the predictions...now can someone please re-do the rankings so we can move up from last. THANK YOU!

[bearFight]

Yeah Whit, and move us down from second. THANKS ASSHOLE

[Rule #5: Ur an idiot]

Simmer Wine-o, they will be coming momentarily. My week has been full of audits, not enough GTL, and entertaining Christina's Pops.

Good predictions Gards, I don't see anything different happening except maybe a BBagger upset, and KIOS ragefacing again and getting their 2nd W. Something is in the water with that group bc I had 5 of them glaring me down with shades of green in their skin when I set foot in Gus' last week.

[Fat_Boy]

Anybody can be beat!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJshw2Axsqc

[a wed wose]

Anybody can be beat!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJshw2Axsqc

J - E - T - S! JETS! JETS! JETS!

[bearFight]

More impressive new york victory...

[BOXEY]

why's it gotta be so moist outside.. i wanna kick balls for reals tonight.

[Rule #5: Ur an idiot]

Are you unable to kick them when there is a damp discharge in the air?

[Rule #5: Ur an idiot]

Anybody can be beat!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJshw2Axsqc

Tim, I agree anyone can be beat. However, that whole showing up thing needs to happen first. Get that part down then you can focus on the ideals of Bart Scott.

[Fat_Boy]

Yeah, we had 8 show up, but only 2 chicks. Unfortunately, we didn't have 2 volunteers to pull a reverse Chaz Bono...

[Rule #5: Ur an idiot]

Touche Naomi Priceline. Next time bring a few wigs. I would accept that as means of a sufficient female opponent.

[bearFight]

BB 5, SK 7
BNPH 15, Rusty Trombones 3
The Dude 5, 30STB 9
Justin Thyme 3, NIM 8
BB 10, WSS 6
3KM 7, Colonel Angus 9
Hot Assets 5, KIOS 3
WSS 10, 3KM 4

Results:
SK 3, BB 2 - Defensive battle, I guess. From what I hear, if the playground were not there BB could have won the game (anonymous SK member said it, not BB) so this was as a pretty close one. Congrats to SK for keeping their championship dreams alive.

BNPH 9, Rusty Trombones 1 - The game went about as expected, it was 3 or 4 to nothing before the 30STB/Dude game started. Nice top of the lineup, assholes.

30STB 11, The Dude Abides 3 - This was 3-3 heading into the 4th, and a bunch of errors let 30STB open it up. The Dude has some potential, but I don't think they'll be going for the championship any time soon.

Justin Thyme 8, NIM 4 - Why you gotta let me down, wholesome Olson, sprinks, and Robyn (Congrats again, by the way!)?

WSS 5, BB 2 - Close game between 2 of the top 4 teams in the league. It looked like WSS brought a full team this week, so that might be why they got the upper hand.

3KM 11, Colonel Angus 8 - I expected this to be close, but I never thought these newbies would pull one out so soon. I did say there were some holes in Colonel Angus's defense - but 11 runs to these drunk assholes? Get it together, guys.

Hot Assets 8, KIOS 3 - Strange that the KIOS/NIM/HA/JT swap-n-play scores went opposite directions this week. Maybe it was the wind that kept Hot Assets from winning, scoring, or even getting on base last week?

3KM 0, WSS 5 (Unofficial score, this is what their captain told me - but WSS definitely won) - Three Kicks apparently got a little bit of defense going by their third game of the season, but supposedly had about 13 pop-outs in a row. Sucks, kids. Better luck next week when you play against a boombox.

[bearFight]

This puts me at 5-3 this week, or 8-6-1 for the season.

[BOXEY]

What can I say, it was mass chaos on the field last night. I've got to give it to those purple pansies.. they played their little hearts out meanwhile we looked like Bad News Bears with James playing the part of Walter Matthau.. keep drinking Whit, my Captaining isn't going to get any better or sober this season and the majority of our players will indeed continue chasing butterflies in the outfield during games. We come from France.

[Darkness]

Justin Thyme 8, NIM 4 - Why you gotta let me down, wholesome Olson, sprinks, and Robyn (Congrats again, by the way!)?

[/quote]

Our team is 26 deep and there is nowhere near enough spots on the field to hide everybody. I would not predict us to win too many games this season.

[Rule #5: Ur an idiot]

BB 5, SK 7
BNPH 15, Rusty Trombones 3
The Dude 5, 30STB 9
Justin Thyme 3, NIM 8
BB 10, WSS 6
3KM 7, Colonel Angus 9
Hot Assets 5, KIOS 3
WSS 10, 3KM 4

Results:
SK 3, BB 2 - Defensive battle, I guess. From what I hear, if the playground were not there BB could have won the game (anonymous SK member said it, not BB) so this was as a pretty close one. Congrats to SK for keeping their championship dreams alive.

Gotta feeling this is gonna be an ongoing problem throughout the season. If people wanna help i was thinking about going over there next week before the game and throwing that shit in the dumpster since Henrico Co. is too fuckin' lazy to do it themselves. That is if i can find my way through the grass jungle.

BNPH 9, Rusty Trombones 1 - The game went about as expected, it was 3 or 4 to nothing before the 30STB/Dude game started. Nice top of the lineup, assholes.

Because having Petros (who belted a HR to the fence right out the gate) at the top of yours last night was any different? Nice try dipshit.

Justin Thyme 8, NIM 4 - Why you gotta let me down, wholesome Olson, sprinks, and Robyn (Congrats again, by the way!)?

Agree with ya Wholesome. Trying to hide 26 people and a prego mascot who all show is borderline impossible.

3KM 0, WSS 5 (Unofficial score, this is what their captain told me - but WSS definitely won) - Three Kicks apparently got a little bit of defense going by their third game of the season, but supposedly had about 13 pop-outs in a row. Sucks, kids. Better luck next week when you play against a boombox.

I hear you finally got someone to dance with you and your boombox last night. Glad to see your balls have finally dropped again Droops.

[bearFight]

That pile of shit needs to go. Are they demolishing an older playground, or building a new one? So dumb.

Petros only had that easy homerun out the gate because The Dude was playing their whole outfield about 10 feet farther out than the bases. It was stupid.

I'm still going to pick NIM to win because I like them. Well, against mediocre/bad teams, i'll still pick them. Sucks having a 26 man team though.

I got some balls back, but I'll continue to bring out both jekyll and hide as much as possible.

Fuck the ligers.

[patty no pants]

NIM didn't have 26 people when they tied us!!! EXCUSES!

[Rule #5: Ur an idiot]

That pile of shit needs to go. Are they demolishing an older playground, or building a new one? So dumb.

Agreed, that shit out there is pretty ridiculous and is a mid game argument or possible injury waiting to happen. Henrico needs to give these kids an ample playground so they have a place to smoke their jeeba and drink their Yoohoo with rum.

Petros only had that easy homerun out the gate because The Dude was playing their whole outfield about 10 feet farther out than the bases. It was stupid.

Semantics sir, unecessary. So is having your outfield hover over second base.

I'm still going to pick NIM to win because I like them. Well, against mediocre/bad teams, i'll still pick them. Sucks having a 26 man team though.

Honestly, after watching a few games, the new teams are catching on quick. For instance patty pants team is very raw, but I have a feeling they will get better and better each week. Hell, one guy, completely new, reminded me of a rule I had forgotten. I don't remember what it was but he was definitely right. Fuckin' dedication right there.

[PDubbZer]

NIM didn't have 26 people when they tied us!!! EXCUSES!

No we didn't. Our excuse for that game was the wind. More excuses to come in the following weeks...

[patty no pants]

Haha. That was our excuse for that game, too. Definitely why neither of us scored any runs!

[patty no pants]

He reminded you that you can run when the ball is first touched, regardless if they catch it. Now, I don't know if he got that from my great coaching skills or knew it on his own before I told him, but I was very proud!

[bearFight]

That pile of shit needs to go. Are they demolishing an older playground, or building a new one? So dumb.

Agreed, that shit out there is pretty ridiculous and is a mid game argument or possible injury waiting to happen. Henrico needs to give these kids an ample playground so they have a place to smoke their jeeba and drink their Yoohoo with rum.

Rum? You mean like... Rumpelstiltskin?

Rumpelstiltskin's a good man, and so are you, Whit. Sometimes.

Week 3 predictions are on their way, everybody. Sorry for the delay. And I know all you dumbshits will read this before I post them. I really need to do this when I'm sober like I used to.